8/27/2006

The Precision of Leaving

There are places less significant
than this: gnarled trees,

the barn with the face of an old man
carved in its slates, the stagnant

black well. There were seasons
stacked like fields, rounded

haybails left out to dry,
the berry bush tangled

in weeds; each red fruit
choking. We gathered them

thinking of mulberry seeds
and imagined the pie.

There are reasons for leaving-
when the snow came down

grey ducks would fly
in V's precise as decision,

the pond still and mourning
in the farmer-child's eye.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Here to the touch, delicate or chaste,
as
'reasons for leaving
when the snow came down


greay ducks would fly
in V's precise as decision,


the pond still and mourning
in the farmer-child's eye.'

It works, all of it, not just the words and lines, quoted,
the snow, the ducks, the V shape a formation in movement,

lastly 'the pond
still and mouring ' few poets write in this style and 'get away with it' while keeping it all real and authentic, but you do.

Anonymous said...

Naturally there's the narrative in your poem, a narrative implicit and all the more powerful for being tacit.

Rachel Phillips said...

The anonymous opinion is often worth more than the heralded. I appreciate your comments!